You Never Have To Prove Your Way

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#wcw. You never have to prove your way into anyone’s life, they just have to trust you that’s all. My mother was never one to prove anything, even when all the stakes were high and odds against her. Even through her addiction, the abuse, and disappointment I learned to trust her. She was the first one in this world that I ever had to trust. I learned to trust the parts of her process that counteracted her addiction, the visceral #spiritmama that birthed me, born me & raised me up. I remember the moment she stopped fighting to keep us although much damage had been done. It was the proudest and most painful part of growing up. I know that she cared more deeply for us than this life flesh could ever show. The day I learned to trust my mother was the day she learned to trust herself. #restinpeacemama #wcwmama #restwell #gonebeforetime #trust #girlrillavintage #tag #theeamazinggrace

In honor of my black mama month

while we on the topic of honoring women, i wish to honor my mommy. and all those close to my bloodline know how she raised hell, and how i hate crackhead jokes because of how real crack is and how her addiction to it ruined our young lives. in the same breath i want to thank her for giving me one simple thing that i’ve never gone short of and that’s love. my mama taught me how to love. she told me a story of my birth and how she breast fed me ’cause that’s what the doctors said was good and healthy for me. she told me how irking it was cause i was always up under her and hungry all the time, but she said she wouldn’t have it no other way-she said, i needed her and that made her feel good. in fact she breast fed up to 4 of my 9 siblings before the drugs took over. and you know she made shame look dignified when she would hold her head high and demand our protection before she got high. she would fly as we watched from the corner. she always smiled as coke foamed to the corners of her mouth-when she reached the top and oh god she would come crashing down and i held her head-held the broken fragments. Still in love with you mama. The first woman I ever loved. ‪#‎Restinpower‬ ‪#‎womensmonth‬ ‪#‎myblackmamamonth‬

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