You Never Have To Prove Your Way

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#wcw. You never have to prove your way into anyone’s life, they just have to trust you that’s all. My mother was never one to prove anything, even when all the stakes were high and odds against her. Even through her addiction, the abuse, and disappointment I learned to trust her. She was the first one in this world that I ever had to trust. I learned to trust the parts of her process that counteracted her addiction, the visceral #spiritmama that birthed me, born me & raised me up. I remember the moment she stopped fighting to keep us although much damage had been done. It was the proudest and most painful part of growing up. I know that she cared more deeply for us than this life flesh could ever show. The day I learned to trust my mother was the day she learned to trust herself. #restinpeacemama #wcwmama #restwell #gonebeforetime #trust #girlrillavintage #tag #theeamazinggrace

Embracing My Ugly

Red Foxx said, “Beauty may be skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone”. Had someone recently ask me, how I “deal” with #adultacne. I replied that I don’t lol! They explained, apologetically in so many words about how their skin is tied to the center of their sense of self and couldn’t understand where my confidence comes from without having #flawlessskin skin. I thanked them for sharing that. I reminded them that my “scars” and #skin are part of me, not all of me. And by embracing my “ugly” I heal and feel great about my life! And no, not as in the way ugly opposes beauty because #ugliness is not the absence of #beauty. My appearance doesn’t dictate that. freeyomind #tag #girlrillavintage #uglyalookwithgreatcharacter

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To Smile Was My Only Inflection

 

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Struggling to Self love in summer

Self portrait. #summer2015 During a time of major transition. When the events in my life had me feeling grimy and less than powerful, unattractive and sore in heart. The sun was brighter and warmer that day, managed to hug me out of bed and into these clothes, onto this chair and under the trees where I could breathe. Suddenly, shit didn’t feel so bad. Reminded me of that unstoppable time on the train from Savannah when I knew then that my existence was never meaningless. And just like that my soul was warmed to the bone. To smile was my only inflection. #tag #theeamazinggrace #girlrillavintage #selflove #sunnydays #soullight #winning

Tomorrow Doesn’t Matter

Image 4-26-16 at 11.43 AM.jpgA collage I made about 5-years ago when I was pregnant, depicts a boy next to a tree, has pieces of my first set of #locs in it. It now sits as a magnet on my refrigerator, a reminder of my youth, my child that didn’t make it, and the ambition I always sought from creating art. My ambition is dormant still and I’ve spent too kmuch time trying to tell my story just the right way not knowing I’ve been living my story all along. I caption this, No one knows tomorrow, yet knowing tomorrow doesn’t matter just as long as the roots are branched widely to anchor the trees that will come from it. We don’t need to know tomorrow. We have to breathe in such a way that tomorrow will never have to search for us. Never need to question our existence cause our existence is alive in the trees. My story is everything. #theeamazinggrace #legacy #live #life #love #self

On Being Human

Some parts of me are delicate. Some parts of me are hard as a rock. I blame it on the human experience. Being thrust from spirit filled spaces to common ground really complicates things. Really makes life a difficult task. Its like we have to unlearn everything we’ve ever learned on the other side of our lives. And some is great, but most is treacherous. And loving unconditional is essential-its damn hard though. ‪#‎theeamazinggrace‬